2 years ago, I decided to go traveling the world. First country? Ethiopia. Bad timing, the coco thing happened when I was overlanding through Southern Africa. I was repatriated to Europe in July 2020, after 7 months.
Back to Europe, I was feeling empty, lonely and lost. Deeply lost. I couldn’t relate to most people around me and I couldn’t stand the Western society standards anymore. Yes, I’m 34 and yes, it can be time to build a home, a family, a career, a love story and else.
But it does not attract me (not yet or, maybe, never, who knows?) -it never attracted me. Anyway, settling down is not something I’m looking for now.
I quickly realised that happiness doesn’t (and shouldn’t!) depend on someone else, on standards, on studies, on wealth, on fame, etc. Our own happiness belongs to us and depends on us. True happiness comes from within FIRST.
The rest contributes to our happiness; it makes it stronger or, sadly, weaker.
So, I came to the conclusion that my forever objective was ‘just’…to be happy. To be truly and deeply happy. I wanted to feel free, I wanted to feel alive, I wanted to change horizons everyday, I wanted to realise a dream, I wanted to be this wild child again, I wanted to BE.
It’s hard to reach happiness though. Because happiness mostly arises from courage, sacrifice, risk, doubt, sadness, and/or fear.
But I was ready. I was ready to be sad to leave my family, my friends, my job (after 11 years in the same company), my frame of references, my flat, my activities, my boyfriendS (*joke*).
I was ready to take the risk to live this overland / nomad life for a few years (or forever!), to be scared of being alone for such a long period of time, and not to earn money anymore.
I was ready to BE and to be Me again.
Do you know what? I feel alive today. I feel deeply alive, but also free, wild, amazed and blessed.
Photo 1: in Botswana
Photo 2: in Europe
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